What if the things affecting your relationships, happiness and sense of self today began long before you realised?

In this second part of Heni Furie’s conversation with Scott Foval, we continue our discussion about the trauma we can carry into midlife - sometimes without even recognising it as trauma.

We explore how unresolved trauma can show up as anger, isolation, difficulties with intimacy and relationships, as well as the connection between trauma, addiction and the ways we learn to cope.

Our conversation also looks specifically at the experience of growing up LGBTQ+: living in the closet, learning to hide parts of ourselves, carrying shame and developing the masks that once helped us feel safe but may continue shaping our lives years later.

Scott shares his own experience of discovering the “invisible armour” he had been carrying and explains why healing isn’t about erasing what happened to us, but changing our relationship with those experiences and finding a greater sense of peace.

This is a conversation conversation about trauma, addiction, shame, masking, authenticity - and what can happen when we finally start talking about the things we’ve been carrying.

This is the seoncd of two conversations with Scott. Subscribe to have the next installment land straight in your inbox.

Recording reposted with written permission from That Midlife Gay / Heni Fourie.